The Death of the Pathological Lens
Your Desire is Not a Diagnosis
We’ve been lied to. For decades, we’ve been taught to look at our sexuality through a clinical, pathological lens—as something to be "fixed," "curbed," or "tamed" to fit a social norm. We’ve been told that if our hunger doesn't fit the standard box, it must be a symptom of a "problem."
I’m calling bullshit.
Jack Morin, writer of The Erotic Mind, doesn’t believe your passion is a medical condition. This psychotherapist and sex therapist argues that our sexual "problems." Our specific turn-ons, "shadow" desires, or even things we feel guilty about are not glitches to be fixed. Instead, they are the coded map to our deepest emotional needs and personal fulfillment. He even believes in the possibility of our human sexuality as a tool for survival and thriving in this mixed human experience: We take the "problems" of our early lives (feelings of powerlessness, abandonment, or being "too much"), unconsciously weave them into our erotic preferences and by engaging with them rather than "solving" them, we find a profound sense of integration.
When we stop asking "Is this normal?" about our sexual selves we change how we digest and integrate life on the whole. We stop being performers and become Aware Practitioners. I desire for you to have the power of a skilled practitioner with your own particular Eros.
The Work: What if, just once, when you felt self-judgement about your sexuality/express/desires/lack of desire(s), you paused?
Take a deep breath. . .Then another.
Say this out loud, “You are no longer required to express your sexuality according to societal norms.”
Just breathe into the tension and say: “I am allowed to want what I want.”
Together we plant the seeds of liberated and integrated beings.
Helping you embrace your "dark" parts, Mel, The Body Witch
